In a recent blog post, writer Kim Wombles describes her 21 -year-old son's developmental strides. Yes, her son is autistic - but no, that doesn't mean he can't grow and develop throughout his life! Says Kim:
My point is, in sharing this new leap in a series of leaps, that when we are primed to believe that disability is inevitable and constant, that the best we can "hope for" is the last thing we'd wish for our children, it can be tremendously easy to fall into a habit of expecting no more than we've been told they can ever aspire towards and working towards even less. We have much work to do, not just with the public, but with ourselves, as well: to believe that progress and new skills are acquirable if we keep pushing for it, working on it. No, not all of our children with autism and other issues will leave disability behind, but they can all make progress, grow and develop. We must remember that when we build on a series of small successes, the feeling of competence will make additional progress all the more possible, because they will believe it to be possible.
This particular post really speaks to me, because it helps me to remember that autism may be a diagnosis, but it is not a prognosis. No matter how far any of us come in our lives, we can always take one more step.
NOTE: Kim has just updated her blog to describe even more forward steps. Bobby is now able to navigate the grocery store on his own - and cook delicious meals!
Thanks, Lisa.
Since I wrote that piece, Bobby has continued to acquire new skills. He’s started kayaking with his grandfather. He’s learning to cook new dishes each week and is now an integral part of meal-making, often cooking the meals entirely on his own.
His progress now is faster than it has ever been. I suspect being able to see how these skills benefit him (and are tied into personal goals) make a large difference; motivation and drive make a huge difference.
Even those with the bleakest of diagnosis, the prognosis
often is unpredictable and that is true of autism as well. I met a mom many years ago whose son never spoke until he was 14 and when he did, it was as if he always spoke. Autism simply does not mean that child or person cant progress or learn daily living skills. What a nice reminder topic.
Well said, Sandy. This is a nice reminder. Thanks a lot Lisa for bringing this topic into light.
It can be difficult to remember that life doesn’t end when you hear the word ‘autism’. For me, it answered a lot of questions and put me in ‘OK, now we know what it is, how do we fix it” mode. It was a relief for me because while I didn’t personally know much about autism, since I had suspected it for about 6 months prior to evaluation and diagnosis began, I knew enough that there were treatments that would help with some of the more worrisome aspects of the condition. That gave me hope and hope allows me to continue on each day.