Oh goodness, it sounds like this poor woman needs some help, some counseling, a community! It’s really hard to do this on your own…Natalie, of course, is right. But where do you find that community?
For me, finding community has been among the toughest projects I've ever undertaken. In fact, while I've discovered many autism groups, and have many acquaintances throughout the autism world, I have yet to connect with a true autism "community" in the usual sense of the word.
I've joined support groups, and met some wonderful parents. We exchange frustrations, ideas, and resources. Then we go home. Occasionally we get together for official support group picnics - but otherwise, our relationships are strictly "all about autism."
I've marched in fundraiser "walkathons," with my husband and kids. And I've always envied those autism moms and dads who show up at fundraising walks with a team of dozens of friends and relations all wearing T-shirts with a child's face emblazoned on the front. Where do they FIND so many people willing to offer time, energy and support on a sunny Saturday morning?
I've worked with quite a few teachers, therapists, doctors and behaviorists. In over 8 years of living with autism, we have found many capable and committed professionals - but very, very few who would go above and beyond their official jobs to provide us with direction, support, coaching or real friendship. To be honest, I've envied (and even occasionally doubted) the moms who say "I've built a fabulous team of therapists and educators who just think the world of my child with autism and would do anything for him." Again - where do they FIND these wonderful, engaged, caring teachers and therapists?
So tell me - have you found a solid, supportive "autism community" with whom you work closely to raise your child? If you have, to what do you attribute your success? Is it all just a matter of having the right personality? Is it luck? Share your thoughts!
First, I called the autism society of my state- local support hardly worked for me with my night-owl hours and trying to maintain bed time routine.
I found it on line, 24/7 there is always some around who wants to listen. Even if you never meet them face to face, some times exchanging phone numbers with a few can help other than reading posts. With out joining on line groups, I’d had no idea my kid wasn’t the only one who never slept. Also, many positive parents can rub off on you!
You sound as if you are able to get plenty of information on Autism so I wondered if you had tried joining more general disability support groups – some of them have more of an emphasis on socializing, with mum’s day and evening get togethers.
If there is nothing like this how about starting something up yourself? My son attended an early intervention program where I had regular contact with the parents. When he went to a mainstream school, I missed this contact so started up a coffee group, firstly from the mums from the intervention program and then adding those who had kids integrated into his school. We would take it in turns to hold coffee mornings at our homes or go out to a cafe. We held a few family activities at the weekends too – just get togethers for a picnic in the park, that sort of thing. I developed some good friends from this who I saw outside of these meetings.
I haven’t got one yet. If I had fewer anxieties about the phone, I could try harder to connect with people I met at a seminar for parents with school-age children in need of an IEP. I’m not even having luck finding a counsellor for my boy who has Aspergers.
No I have tried to find support groups and others with autism in VA and if you live in Va Beach area great…but I don’t.